A Mysterious Clanging Noise
by EllaFrost
Summary: For once it seems as if Cardiff is safe,leaving the team longing for excitement. When a mysterious noise emerges from below Torchwood realises that everything is much worse than they ever believed... then Tosh disappears & all hell breaks loose. R&R?
1. Chapter 1

"So, Tosh any rift spikes lately?" Owen asked.

"Nope," she replied, tapping into the mainframe. "Nothing."

"Any new aliens?" he continued.

"Nope," she shrugged.

"Any old aliens? Any explosions, any weevils any god damn anything?" he pummeled the desk with his hand to emphasise the last three words.

"No," she replied lightly, beginning to look concerned.

"Bummer," he sighed, "seems like there's nothing going on in Cardiff whatsoever." he shrugged. "Whenever I want a break there's a billion and one things to do and whenever I don't... well. Nothing, nada, zip, zilch."

His face twisted in annoyance.

"See ya Tosh, I'm outta here."

He gave the desk one farewell punch before shambling down the steps looking very annoyed with the world.

"God, what's up with him?" asked Gwen, clattering up the opposite set of steps.

"No idea," Tosh sighed, "but I wish I could help."

"You always do," Gwen smiled, placing her elbows on the desk. "Anyway, I need a favour."

"Uh-huh?" Tosh looked dubious.

"It's nothing bad, I promise!" Gwen laughed, "I just wanted to ask you if you'd come grab some coffee with me? It's kind of boring when Cardiff hits a dry spot... and I still don't know how to use the filter," Gwen admitted ashamedly.

"Did anyone say coffee?" Ianto asked, emerging as if from nowhere with a tray of steaming hot coffee.

"Ianto, you're a star," Gwen beamed as she reached over and took a cup.

"Mmm. I second that," Tosh laughed as she sipped the coffee. "So, what are we going to do now to occupy ourselves?"

"How about a game of scrabble," Ianto suggested, a playful grin emblazoned across his face.

"Ianto," Gwen rolled her eyes.

"Or I could teach you to use the "damn coffee filter"?"

"I think I'm alright," Gwen laughed, "I've got Tosh with her genius and you with your coffee making skills to fall back on."

"Ahhh, but you never know Gwen, I could get eaten by Myfanwy."

"Oh totally," she remarked, rolling her eyes for the second time, "and there's a giant alien downstairs messing with the pipework."

"Could be," Owen appeared back into their line of sight, humming as he approached where they were stood.

"I thought you were going home...?" Tosh asked, bemused at his sudden change of attitude.

"I was. I just thought I heard something so I came back. If you want trouble, come to torchwood, I always say."

Clang.

"How's that for a harbinger?" Owen laughed.

And there it was again, that strange clang resounding through the hub.

Clang. Clang. Clang.

For days now, Torchwood had been having trouble with its pipes. They seemed to be getting a little cranky, rumbling and grumbling all day and all night. It was enough to drive you crazy!

"Hey Gwen, must be that giant alien!" Ianto laughed.

Clang. Clang. Clang.

The sound got louder and louder, as if there were something jumping up and down on metal, making a tremendous boom everytime their feet hit the ground.

Gwen folded her arms.

"I don't know about you," she spoke nervously ,"but I'm beginning to get a little creeped out."

"Ha," Ianto laughed, "And here's from the woman who reckons she'd be better at Most Haunted than the, I quote "wusses on that show?"

"Yes well, Gwen replied "At least then I'd know I was dealing with something real."

"Oh look, here comes Jack," Ianto tried to look nonplussed, but completely failed, resigning himself to a not-so-secret smile

Jack worked his way around the catastrophe that was the hub, oblivious to Ianto and his good intentions.

"Hang on a minute" Jack spoke, jumping up the last couple of steps to the main part of the hub. "Gwen, you've seen aliens, witnessed someone come back to life about a gazillion times and seen a real life pterodactyl and you still don't believe in ghosts?"

"Gwenny here, believe in ghosts?" Owen asked playfully, putting one of his arms around her shoulder and reaching out with his over to squeeze her cheek, "Don't be daft!"

Gwen stamped the three inch heels of her best boots down on Owen's foot.

"Ouch! What was that for?," Owen asked, groaning as he lifted up his foot to rub the sore spot.

"That's for treating me like an idiot," she remarked, head held up high.

"I think I better step in here" Ianto spoke, edging inbetween the couple, "we have enough problems with alien bites let alone what I suspect Gwen could do with her teeth."

"Don't be daft, I wouldn't bite him, I could do far worse damage than that," she smiled, tapping her temple knowingly, a glint of mischief in her eyes.

"Anyway, before you two lovebirds kill each other, how's about we go investigate this mysterious clanging?" Jack asked, "I'm sure it's just the whirling and swirling of the wonderful excrement of this species, but hey, better safe than sorry!"

The team brightened at the prospect of something to do.

"Sure", they unanimously replied.

"I just hope it's not one of your ghosts Gwen," Ianto laughed, "because then we might have something to contend with!"

Gwen scowled. "What are we waiting for? Let's get to it!"

She grabbed a gun from the desk, shoved it in her back pocket and leaped the stairs.

"Come on you lazy gits!" she turned back, taunting them but beaming all the same.

The team grabbed their weapons and started the journey down to the basement.


	2. Chapter 2

Owen was the first there. He could feel the tremble of the anticipation coursing through his veins like a drug as they approached. Down and down they went, travelling through a series of complicated passages that most of the team had passed through few times before.

Owen, however was an expert. Navigating his way through the tunnels like a rat he was soon at his destination.

A small door lay, set into the concrete wall, simplistic in comparison to the mighty vault most would expect to lie hidden so secretly. It wasn't even locked.

"Why all this trouble Jack?" asked Gwen, bemused by the complicated system.

Jack looked thoughtful for a moment, for once not as quick to the draw as usually expected. Gwen, noticing the pacified look on Jack's faced presumed correctly that perhaps Jack, as well as Ianto, pleasured in the facial structure of the other.

"Well Gwen, if an alien got hold of our erm, excrement, then all hell could break loose."

Owen turned around amused.

"So even our shit is a security problem now?"

"Not to put it in those terms," Tosh replied, "but basically yes."

A sarcastic grin transformed Owen's face.

"So, what on earth could the aliens do with our "excrement"? Control us like puppets on strings? Construct a disgusting Eiffel Tower? Use it as compost to harbour new life for their planet?"

"Wow, who knew the kid was so bright?" Jack asked, utterly amused.

"You do realise," Ianto started, "that all of the things you just mentioned could happen..."

"What on Earth would aliens want with an excrement Eiffel tower?" Gwen interrupted, thinking aloud.

"... if you'd let me finish I was about to tell you."

"Nah, it's alright mate," Owen's grin heightened, tapping Ianto on the soldier, "we all know it's simply art."

"Who in their right minds..."

CLANG

"Alright gang, that's enough. I think we got a bit off track there... ready to kick some alien butt?"

"Hell yeah," Owen replied, attentions shifting as he grasped his weapon more tightly, jamming his finger onto the trigger, bypassing the safety switch.

"Don't be too hasty Owen," Jack cautioned, "on three."

The team fanned out, Gwen and Ianto's torches lighting the dim corridor inbetween the intricate tunnels and the oddly placed door.

"One...Two...Three!" Jack shouted, kicking the door swiftly open as the team burst into action, surveying the room.


	3. Chapter 3

The torches cast an eerie light around the room as the team fanned out.

At first, nothing in particular could be seen, it was just a dingy room, filled with pipes of vastly different sizes: some tiny, the size of straws, interweaving like spaghetti; others large enough for the whole team to walk through side by side.

In the middle of the room, surrounded by many others, lay an incandescent pipe two feet width-wise, whistling as gushes of hot steam escaped tiny holes.

"Sheesh," remarked Jack, "I should have someone take a look at that, I'm surprised it didn't show up on the system, Tosh are you sure nothing peculiar's come up?"

Tosh looked at Jack impatiently.  
"If it had come up I would've told you."

"Yeah, I know. Just asking, bit strange, that's all."

"Is that where the noise is coming from?" Gwen asked, looking dubious that such a small pipe could be causing such a loud noise.

"Nope," Jack smiled brilliantly, "My bets is that it's coming from that big one up there."

The team inclined their heads simultaneously, peering upwards. There among all the other pipes, lay a pipe that did not particularly stand out – it was no wider, no smaller, no different from many of the others.

It was dark grey, and only wide enough to fit perhaps Tosh or Owen inside if they were prepared to crawl around on their stomachs. As if on cue, the pipe preceded to make a gurgling noise, before emitting another loud CLANG.

"It's a bit boring," Owen complained, a scowl overcoming his features, "Is that really where all our...you know,"

Ianto gave Owen a rather scornful look.

"What?"

"Do you realise how often..?"

"Would you both shut up already," Gwen sighed, "We're trying to FIX a problem, not cause another one."

"Well if you'd keep your big gob out..."

"Gwen, Owen, that's enough," Jack uttered, frustrated, "Tosh, give them the lowdown."

Tosh pulled a handheld computer out of her pocket, tapping at the screen a couple of times with a stylus which slid out the back, displaying blueprints of the hub, then zooming in on the pipe.

"That pipe used to contain a rather interesting bacteria which Jack confiscated, erm, a long time ago?"

Tosh turned to look at Jack, "You really could be more accurate with your reports you know."

"And spoil your fun of guessing? Never."  
She sighed, "Anyway, to sum up, Jack decided that a pipe was a good place to put it despite the fact that, you know, it kinda gets hot in there and it can be rather moist, which are the known things bacteria needs to grow. So basically, thanks to Jack, there's some alien creature or bacteria or whatever in there which Jack failed to contain or notify us, creating just one more job for the team. It's a good thing it's a slow week, isn't it?"

"Yup," Jack smiled, still appearing to be nonplussed, "Saved for just this circumstance."

"He likes to pretend he knows everything about the future," beamed Ianto.

"We'd noticed..."

"So, any volunteers?"

"Volunteers? For what!" Gwen asked.

"Yeah, I don't exactly fancy sifting through some alien bacteria and getting some weird illness nobody knows how to cure," Owen muttered.

"Action man to the heart," Gwen teased, "What happened to wanting some action?"

"He chickened out," Ianto laughed, "Common occurrence to Torchwood."

"Shut up."

"I'll do it!" Tosh offered.

"You what?" Owen said, "As if Tosh, you're scared of getting a cold, you love this job so much."

"I think it would be a fascinating opportunity to see how bacteria develops in an alien environment."

"Well, that pipe's certainly something," Jack frowned, "Are you sure about this Tosh?"

"Course I am, I wouldn't volunteer if I wasn't. Besides, it's not big enough for anyone else, bar maybe Owen, and since he's too scared..."

"I am NOT too scared..."

"Alright then," Jack smiled, glancing up "Tosh, suit up and take the front, Owen I want you to help her up there, the ladders are kind of tricky,"

"I'm sure they'll have a brilliant time exploring their pipes," Ianto offered.

"Ianto...?"

"Yes Owen?"

"Remind me to kill you later."

"A little play on words never hurt anyone, and besides which, action man, you wouldn't have the muscles anyway."

Ianto, Jack and Gwen retreated, leaving Tosh and Owen alone in the dark.


End file.
